im looking for a program to where i can install on both my kids computer to go and see what they are doing with out them knowing im on there computers when im on mines
If you're willing to pay for the software, then I'd recommend using dameware's mini remote control software. You can download a free 30 day trial from their website to try it before you buy.
http://www.dameware.com/products/dmrc/
You can try the free edition of RealVNC, but I'm not sure if there's a way to connect without your kids knowing. I've used it before, but it's been awhile and I don't recall if there's a setting that allows you to connect invisibly. Here's the link if you want to give it a try.
http://www.realvnc.com/cgi-bin/download.cgi
Well, I don't agree with spying (unless they have proven they need it, but I'm not here to start a debate), but with RealVNC when a remote host connects to the server, the mouse can flash repeatedly and the icon in the taskbar turns black.
If you want a way to control Internet content, try looking into OpenDNS. You can monitor logs and block content. Link here