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Rate my poem :)
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AfterDawn Addict
15 product reviews
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20. December 2009 @ 08:01 |
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Ok so I've been seeing/going out with this girl for a few weeks now. And me being a nerd I'm woefully inexperienced in the ways of "love". So instead of fumbling with awkward "words" I wrote her a poem. Don't look too deeply into some of the wording that's for her and I to share :P
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You touched me then you kissed me.
I've never felt like this before.
You challenged me then you pushed me
I've never loved like this before.
You hold me then you rolled me
Left me wanting for more.
I thought things I've never thought
And did things I've never done
You've changed the way I see each day
And when I seem quiet with nothing to say
You've actually taken my breath away
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I know it's sickeningly mushy, but besides that what do you guys/gals think? Don't bother editing as it's already been sent. I wanted her to read it in its truest form(first draft) :)
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scum101
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22. December 2009 @ 02:04 |
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I always found the more direct "does thee f-ck or what?" worked better. something like a 70% success rate.. being a rather famous musician at the time might have helped slightly..
Small hint.. poetry makes most modern girls want to throw up.. send her a bottle of Jack Daniels instead ;)
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AfterDawn Addict
15 product reviews
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22. December 2009 @ 03:08 |
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Yeah but that's just the thing she's really sweet. And I'm pretty sure she liked it. I just wanted to express my feelings to her in the truest way possible you know? I had the urge to write down my thoughts and this is what came out on the screen.
Like I said I'm hardest of the hardcore nerds. My favorite movie ever is Star Wars and I read Lord of the Rings and all that crap you know? I mean I know more about how to volt mod a video card with a pencil than I do about romancing a girl...
AMD Phenom II X6 1100T 4GHz(20 x 200) 1.5v 3000NB 2000HT, Corsair Hydro H110 w/ 4 x 140mm 1500RPM fans Push/Pull, Gigabyte GA-990FXA-UD5, 8GB(2 x 4GB) G.Skill RipJaws DDR3-1600 @ 1600MHz CL9 1.55v, Gigabyte GTX760 OC 4GB(1170/1700), Corsair 750HX
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AfterDawn Addict
1 product review
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22. December 2009 @ 04:24 |
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Good luck...it seems a little creepy to email someone a poem if you ask me.
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AfterDawn Addict
15 product reviews
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22. December 2009 @ 04:38 |
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Yeah but it's not quite like that. I know it's sickening but it's like a sweet romance you know that? I don't just email her you know we spend a lot of time together. So instead of analyzing my relationship why won't someone give me a serious answer. Luck has nothing to do with it right now. I love her and she loves me. I suppose it's just as creepy to send her flowers? You obviously have never dated or truly been in love because you plainly don't understand my feelings or why I wrote the poem. It's not creepy to tell somebody you love them.
AMD Phenom II X6 1100T 4GHz(20 x 200) 1.5v 3000NB 2000HT, Corsair Hydro H110 w/ 4 x 140mm 1500RPM fans Push/Pull, Gigabyte GA-990FXA-UD5, 8GB(2 x 4GB) G.Skill RipJaws DDR3-1600 @ 1600MHz CL9 1.55v, Gigabyte GTX760 OC 4GB(1170/1700), Corsair 750HX
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This message has been edited since posting. Last time this message was edited on 22. December 2009 @ 04:41
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scum101
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22. December 2009 @ 10:15 |
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You are correct.. it's not creepy at all. It's sweet, but keep the star wars stuff to yourself unless she likes it too. That kind of thing goes in the "golf" or "fishing" box.. don't mention it until it's too late for anybody to back out.. hahahahahaha
If poetry is your thing then go for it.. I just don't like it myself.. I'm not that kind of girl. I prefer a bloke to say what he thinks and get on with it, not beat about the bush.. (errrr.. did that come out right?) Keep on if it feels good.. maybe she's flattered you took so much effort, maybe not.. only you will know. I think it's pretty good, not my thing admittedly and because I'm not into poetry I'm no fair judge of whether it's good or not.. If it was in my email I would throw up.. then laugh myself silly.. then bounce it..
As for never being in love.. ahem! I was married before you were born son, you are younger than my daughter.. I remember you joining this site. Things are improving I can tell.. did all that hassle sort itself out in the end or is it still hanging over you like the Sword of Damocles? ;)
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AfterDawn Addict
15 product reviews
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22. December 2009 @ 17:21 |
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Quote:
You are correct.. it's not creepy at all. It's sweet, but keep the star wars stuff to yourself unless she likes it too. That kind of thing goes in the "golf" or "fishing" box.. don't mention it until it's too late for anybody to back out.. hahahahahaha
Haha shes aware of my "nerd-ness" but I don't like geek out with her. I did get her to watch the original Star Wars though and she liked it. Then I wanted to stab Harrison Ford because she said Han Solo was cute :P
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If poetry is your thing then go for it.. I just don't like it myself.. I'm not that kind of girl. I prefer a bloke to say what he thinks and get on with it, not beat about the bush.. (errrr.. did that come out right?)
Umm well we didn't just meet. I've definitely told her right out how I feel about her. And she thought the poem was sweet because we're just goofy like that. Keep in mind she's not above being a geek as well she thinks my glasses are sexy you know?
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As for never being in love.. ahem! I was married before you were born son, you are younger than my daughter.. I remember you joining this site. Things are improving I can tell.. did all that hassle sort itself out in the end or is it still hanging over you like the Sword of Damocles? ;)
Ok just FYI I'm 19. Just FYI.
Eh stuff has gotten better in some ways and worse in others. We're keeping on you know?
I'm honest. Like sickeningly honest. I felt poetry was a good way to get my thoughts on the level. Sadly that's also my problem I'm more of a writer than a talker. But it's not like I can't say what I mean. I just thought she would appreciate the gesture.
AMD Phenom II X6 1100T 4GHz(20 x 200) 1.5v 3000NB 2000HT, Corsair Hydro H110 w/ 4 x 140mm 1500RPM fans Push/Pull, Gigabyte GA-990FXA-UD5, 8GB(2 x 4GB) G.Skill RipJaws DDR3-1600 @ 1600MHz CL9 1.55v, Gigabyte GTX760 OC 4GB(1170/1700), Corsair 750HX
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AfterDawn Addict
1 product review
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23. December 2009 @ 00:13 |
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Sorry bro...I was under the impression that you had one date with her and then started sending her love emails. If you have a relationship already, I would think that you would know what she likes better than anyone here.
As for an overall rating, I think you used the word "ME" a bit too much in the first 5 lines...and it is ultra-mushy, but otherwise not terrible. ;)
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scum101
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23. December 2009 @ 05:01 |
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hehehe.. I know how old you are.. my sprog is 20... and I'm 44 in a couple of weeks.. I could be a grandparent for all I know. XD
Why not try this.. I'm a bit of an actress.. goes with the territory.. write down what you want to pass on, then learn your lines... you can chop and change them on the fly.
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ps3lvanub
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5. March 2010 @ 08:31 |
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A brilliant poem. I'm sure she'll love it if you haven't read it to her already. Oh and a lil' off topic here, what is a Volt Mod?
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AfterDawn Addict
15 product reviews
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5. March 2010 @ 16:29 |
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She liked it a lot actually. Sadly we've had a bit of a falling out but she would still like to get together at a later point :P
AMD Phenom II X6 1100T 4GHz(20 x 200) 1.5v 3000NB 2000HT, Corsair Hydro H110 w/ 4 x 140mm 1500RPM fans Push/Pull, Gigabyte GA-990FXA-UD5, 8GB(2 x 4GB) G.Skill RipJaws DDR3-1600 @ 1600MHz CL9 1.55v, Gigabyte GTX760 OC 4GB(1170/1700), Corsair 750HX
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Senior Member
28 product reviews
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9. March 2010 @ 02:00 |
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Glad to hear she liked it. Good to see there are still people out there with some class.
That's being said, here's a LOTR version:
You touched the one ring to rule them all, then gave it a kiss
My Precious...
You challenged me like Aragorn challenged the Nazgűls
My Precious...
You held me like the Balrog's whip on Gandalf's leg
My Precious...
I thought things I've never thought before, like Gimli making friends with Legolas
And did things I've never done, like reforging the Anduril
You've changed the way I see Middle Earth
And when I seem quiet like Mordor, Núrn
You've actually taken my Precious...away
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AfterDawn Addict
15 product reviews
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9. March 2010 @ 02:18 |
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Oh and a lil' off topic here, what is a Volt Mod?
There are resistors on a video card that control the voltage to the core. Using a pencil, you can "shade" these in and lower the resistance. As a result, your voltage rises, allowing to overclock further.
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That's being said, here's a LOTR version:
Lol
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topguyza
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21. March 2010 @ 11:15 |
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i got hit by lightning for being a total idiot. edited by ddp
This message has been edited since posting. Last time this message was edited on 21. March 2010 @ 19:39
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ddp
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21. March 2010 @ 19:35 |
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topguyza (account created on 19 Mar, 2006) has used same IP address as wemimo1 (banned on 15 Jan, 2010)
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