Mobile/PDA About Us Advertise here
User User name Password  
  Not registered yet? Register here.
Lost your password? Click here. 		 
  Home   News   Guides   Downloads   Glossary   Hardware   Profiles   Forums   v4  
 Advertise at AfterDawn.com     Link to us!     Private messages     Compose a private message     List of all updated threads     Threads without replies     Search messages
Monday 21.7.2025 / 17:20
Search AfterDawn Forums:        In English   Suomeksi   På svenska
afterdawn.com > forums > general discussion > safety valve > drinking guide for the holidays
Show topics
 
Forums
Forums
drinking guide for the holidays
  Jump to:
 
Posted Message
andmerr
Suspended permanently
_ 		22. May 2005 @ 02:53 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
this ones for all you alcoholics, you know who you are!!!!!!!


Drinking Guide for the Holidays

SYMPTOM: Feet cold and wet.
FAULT: Glass being held at incorrect angle.
ACTION: Rotate glass so that open end points toward ceiling.

SYMPTOM: Beer unusually pale and tasteless.
FAULT: Glass empty.
ACTION: Get someone to buy you another beer.

SYMPTOM: Opposite wall covered with fluorescent lights.
FAULT: You have fallen over backward.
ACTION: Have yourself lashed to bar.

SYMPTOM: Mouth contains cigarette butts.
FAULT: You have fallen forward.
ACTION: See above.

SYMPTOM: Beer tasteless, front of your shirt is wet.
FAULT: Mouth not open, or glass applied to wrong part of face.
ACTION: Retire to restroom, practice in mirror.

SYMPTOM: Feet warm and wet.
FAULT: Improper bladder control.
ACTION: Stand next to nearest dog, complain about her house training.

SYMPTOM: Floor blurred.
FAULT: You are looking through bottom of empty glass.
ACTION: Get someone to buy you another beer.

SYMPTOM: Floor moving.
FAULT: You are being carried out.
ACTION: Find out if you are being taken to another bar.

SYMPTOM: Room seems unusually dark.
FAULT: Bar has closed.
ACTION: Confirm home address with bartender.

SYMPTOM: Taxi suddenly takes on colorful aspect and textures.
FAULT: Beer consumption has exceeded personal limitations.
ACTION: Cover mouth


[ + quote]
Advertisement
_ 		__
squizzle
AfterDawn Addict
_ 		23. May 2005 @ 14:30 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
pretty funny stuff man!!!
[ + quote]
Convert PAL to NTSC or NTSC to PAL------>http://forums.afterdawn.com/thread_view.cfm/167922
ScubaPete's guides------>http://www.dvdplusvideo.com/tutorial007.html
Bbmayo's guides------>http://home.comcast.net/~bbmayo/index.html

My ever-growing movie collection------>http://www.intervocative.com/dvdcollection.aspx/squizzle
Auslander
AfterDawn Addict
_ 		23. May 2005 @ 14:37 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
it's a wonderful guide. think of all the people you've helped! :)
[ + quote]
philipman
Senior Member
_ 		23. May 2005 @ 21:54 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
nice, some of those have happened to me before.
[ + quote]
andmerr
Suspended permanently
_ 		23. May 2005 @ 22:12 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
its being awhile since i've had a drink but well i have experienced most of the above.O'H SHOULD I SAY i have really embarrassed my self publicly now and again.

One year i really liked this bird and well to cut a long story short got so pissed that i actually got on top of the table , started yelling out about how many guys she was sleeping with to the open bar.To quieten me down i was given some food but well you get the idea.You know i reckon they were trying to poison me.Something didnt agree and everything came up to say hello,literally.After that day i got banned from that particular establishment, couldnt really remember most of it except my boss was really understanding.Kept on reminding me how i spiced that dinner up for every one.This is a true story, it happened to a me.I still cant live it down.
[ + quote]

This message has been edited since posting. Last time this message was edited on 23. May 2005 @ 22:18
creaky
Moderator
_ 		24. May 2005 @ 00:17 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
urghhhhhh thanks is that my toast i can hear trying to escape!
[ + quote]


Main PC ~ Intel C2Q Q6600 (G0 Stepping)/Gigabyte GA-EP45-DS3/2GB Crucial Ballistix PC2-8500/Zalman CNPS9700/Antec 900/Corsair HX 620W
Network ~ DD-WRT ~ 2node WDS-WPA2/AES ~ Buffalo WHR-G54S. 3node WPA2/AES ~ WRT54GS v6 (inc. WEP BSSID), WRT54G v2, WRT54G2 v1. *** Forum Rules ***
Advertisement
_ 		__
 
_
squizzle
AfterDawn Addict
_ 		24. May 2005 @ 06:56 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
andmerr, I have a habit of doing stupid things when I drink too. That's why I quit drinking.
[ + quote]
Convert PAL to NTSC or NTSC to PAL------>http://forums.afterdawn.com/thread_view.cfm/167922
ScubaPete's guides------>http://www.dvdplusvideo.com/tutorial007.html
Bbmayo's guides------>http://home.comcast.net/~bbmayo/index.html

My ever-growing movie collection------>http://www.intervocative.com/dvdcollection.aspx/squizzle
afterdawn.com > forums > general discussion > safety valve > drinking guide for the holidays
 

Digital video: AfterDawn.com | AfterDawn Forums
Music: MP3Lizard.com
Gaming: Blasteroids.com | Blasteroids Forums | Compare game prices
Software: Software downloads
Blogs: User profile pages
RSS feeds: AfterDawn.com News | Software updates | AfterDawn Forums
International: AfterDawn in Finnish | AfterDawn in Swedish | AfterDawn in Norwegian | download.fi
Navigate: Search | Site map
About us: About AfterDawn Ltd | Advertise on our sites | Rules, Restrictions, Legal disclaimer & Privacy policy
Contact us: Send feedback | Contact our media sales team
 
  © 1999-2025 by AfterDawn Ltd.

  IDG TechNetwork