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Where Did All The Old Timers Go, A Public Meeting Place For Open Discussion
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20. March 2007 @ 09:23 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
Quote:
A Iranian drinks his beer and suddenly throws his glass in the air, Pulls 
out his pistol and shoots the glass to pieces. He says, "In I our country
glasses are so cheap we don't need to drink from the same glass twice." 
 
 
 
An Iraqi, obviously impressed by this, drinks his beer, throws his glass 
into the air, pulls out his AK-47 and shoots the glass to pieces. He says, 
"In Iraq we have so much sand to make glasses that we don't need to drink 
out of the same glass twice either." 
 
 
 
The Arizona girl, cool as a cucumber, picks up her beer and drinks it, 
throws her glass into the air, pulls out her gun and shoots the Iranian and 
the Iraqi, and catches her glass. She says, "In America we have so many 
illegal Iranian and Arabs that we don't have to drink with the same ones 
twice."


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gerry1
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20. March 2007 @ 09:30 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
LMAO! We have a huge problem with illegals here in Philly...I can't imagine what Texas and Arizona go through.
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20. March 2007 @ 12:51 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
Quote:
Brian woke up one morning immensely aroused so he turned over to his wife's side of the bed.

His wife, Heather had already awakened though and she was downstairs preparing breakfast in the kitchen. Afraid that he might spoil things by getting
up, Brian called his little boy into the room and asked him to take this note to your beautiful Mommy.

The note read:
The Tent Pole is Up,
The Canvas is Spread,
The Hell With Breakfast,
Come Back To Bed.

Heather, grinning, answered the note and then asked her son to take this to Daddy.

Her note read:
Take The Pole Down,
Put The Canvas Away,
The Monkey Had A Hemorrage,
No Circus Today.

Brian, read the note and quickly scribbled a reply, then, he asked his son to take it back to "the lady in the kitchen."

His note read:
The Tent Pole's Still Up,
And The Canvas Still Spread
So Drop What You're Doing.
And Come Give Me Some Head.

Laughing, Heather answered the note and then asked her son to take this to the poor dude upstairs.

Her note read:
I'm Sure That Your Pole's
The BEST In The Land.
But I'm Busy Right Now,
Do It By Hand
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20. March 2007 @ 13:28 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
lol, owned :)



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20. March 2007 @ 14:26 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
Good evening all!!

Cow from Ohio


The only cow in a small town in Arkansas stopped giving milk.

The people did some research and found they could buy a cow in Ohio, for $200.00.

They bought the cow from Ohio and the cow was wonderful.

The cow produced lots of milk all of the time, and the people were pleased and very happy.

They decided to acquire a bull to mate with the cow, so they would never have to worry about their milk supply again.

They bought a bull and put it in the pasture with their beloved cow.
However whenever the bull came close to the cow, the cow would move away.

No matter what approach the bull tried, the cow would move away
from the bull and he could not succeed in his quest.

The people were very upset and decided to ask the vet, who was very wise, what to do.

They told the Vet what was happening.

"Whenever the bull approaches our cow, she moves away.

If he approaches from the back, she moves forward.

When he approaches her from the front, she backs off.

An approach from the side and she walks away to the other side."

The Vet thinks about this for a minute and asked, "Did you buy this cow in Ohio?"

The people were dumbfounded, since they had never mentioned where they bought the cow.

"You are truly a wise Vet," they said. "How did you know we got the cow in Ohio?"

The Vet replied with a distant look in his eye, "My wife is from Ohio."





HP a1118x-b/athlon 64-3300+/BenQ 1650 BCDC/LG 8163B/Modded Wii/Epson-R300 and Ty Watershields!!!
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20. March 2007 @ 15:06 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
GOOD evening to all...........

@saugmon,
Thanks for the heads-up on the Sony's. :) Got 'em today.


Time for a funny............ROFLMAO!!!!!

Taxicab Confessions...
A passenger in a taxi leaned over to ask the driver a question and tapped him on the shoulder. The driver screamed, lost control of the cab, nearly hit a bus, drove up over the curb, and stopped just inches from a large plate glass window.
For a few moments everything was silent in the cab, when then the still shaking driver said, "I'm sorry but you scared the daylights out of me."
The frightened passenger apologized to the driver and said he didn't realize a mere tap on the shoulder could frighten him so much.
The driver replied, "No, no, I'm sorry, it's entirely my fault. Today is my first day driving a cab. I've been driving a hearse for the last 25 years."

[img]quoted from creaky, "I think i need a break away from this thread, you are just talking absolute and utter nonsense now. Im off to ban myself and hit myself repeatedly with blunt objects. And if im still conscious after that im going to install Windows Me."[/img]
PC build thread blank media thread Ultimate DVD Backup resource thread what did binkie7 do to me???
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20. March 2007 @ 20:56 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
Hi Everyone Good Evening!

I have missed this thread. I just spent the last hour reading all the jokes since my last post and laughing my ass off. The winners: Janrocks: The newsroom snow story cracked me the F up!!!!! Still giggling. AND Ireland: The New Priest #5

I have been so addicted to my Nintendo DS lately that I have not even been reading my board!!!!!! That thing is the devil...but I like it! I really like it. I don't know if I will survive getting a wii. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh but I want one. It's the stupid f-ing stupid animal crossing game!!!! I am addicted to planting virtual trees and fishing. So dumb!

But I have been busy with the water wheel stuff too. We have more power than ever 26 amps DC at 50 volts charging a 48VDC system full time. Super gonzo excited as we have not burned any fossil feul (deisel) in over a week now. Not since a slight tweek to the transformers (hint check your math!!!!!!!) has the generator needed to run.

I am so proud!!!!!!!!!! I am officially producing more than I use. AND WE ARE POWER HOGS HERE!!!!! Way not into giving up my juice just producing more and more CLEAN juice! Kitty is purring...

We did, however, suffer one battery explosion. Factory defective the warranty covered it but... HOLY CONCUSSION BATMAN what a BooM! The box we designed for the batteries contained the shrapnel and the system continued to function but shi# I just about had a heart attack at that sound.

Anyhow, I missed chatting with everyone. Hope all is well...Who else has snow today...WTF over. First day of Spring! Hello! It was 70 degrees last week.

^ ^
>:<



http://www.myspace.com/kittyprincess
"Whatever the next best thing is, it better not suck."
Ripper ROCKED this sig for me!
PacMan777
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21. March 2007 @ 01:15 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
Hey Kitty
Good to see you. The Spring monsoon has already started. It's been raining here the last few days. Last week it was so warm I turned on the AC. Found out the compressor in a 2 year old Trane had headed south. 10 year warranty so I'm still happy. I needed it a few hours this evening. Are you developing enough power for cooling yet?


gerry1
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21. March 2007 @ 03:26 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
@Kitty...do you still use an outhouse and an outdoor well complete with hand pump LOL! j/k :)
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21. March 2007 @ 05:58 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
good morning,this is what i had with me breakfast served hot..

ME BRIDES IRISH BREAD

If you can't trust me brides Irish Soda Bread, who can you trust. This is an old family recipe from my wife's Aunt.

-------- ------------ --------------------------------
4 c Flour*
1 c Sugar
1 t Salt
2 ts Heaping baking powder
1 t Carraway seeds
1 Egg
Buttermilk
2 tb Butter**
1 1/2 c Raisins -- 2 fists
1/2 c Currants
1 c Mixed fruit -- (1/2 lb)
1/4 ts Baking soda


If you can't trust a Mary Catherine Gallagher for
Irish Soda Bread, who can you trust. This is an old
family recipe from my wife's Aunt.

*(Fill the sifter are her words) **(a good chunk--her
words) Preheat oven to 400*F Soak raisins and currants
in hot water. Put sugar in a mixing bowl and cut
butter into it. Cut until it looks like white
cornmeal. Put in the caraway seeds Put flour, salt,
baking powder and baking soda into the sifter and sift
into the sugar and butter mix.
If you use the mixed fruit, cut any large pieces and
mix into the flour mixture. Drain the raisins and
currants and dry well.
Mix into the dry ingredients. In a cup measurer, beat
the egg with a fork and fill the cup with buttermilk.
Mix lightly.
Make a hole in dry ingredients and pour in milk and
egg. Mix well until everything is wet and starts to
pull away from the sides of the bowl. Add more liquid
if needed.
Knead slightly to form into a round loaf.
Place loaf in a HOT iron frying pan which has been
greased and floured. Cut a large cross nearly through
the loaf. Bake at 400*F for 10 minutes and lower
temperature to 250*F for another 60 minutes.
Remove from oven and while still hot brush with a
mixture of 5 TBS sugar and 1/4 cup evaporated milk
(mixed well). Turn out onto a rack when cool.


- - - - - - - - - - - -

Quote:
A Wish for a Friend
Wishing you a rainbow
For sunlight after showers?<br>Miles and miles of Irish smiles
For golden happy hours?<br>Shamrocks at your doorway
For luck and laughter too,
And a host of friends that never ends
Each day your whole life through!

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21. March 2007 @ 07:19 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
Hi Pac Hi Gerrry

@PacMan

I think I will have enough power to run my air conditioner this summer. We will be the first in the area to run one. Silly huh...

@Gerry

NO Gerry no outhouse. I have indoor plumbing. Some around here still do that way but NO WAY not this kitty. I need a modern litter box! But...we did put a well and hand pump outside by the barn for water and dog baths. Works great for muddy feet too! Our Water Main is the creak though and is filtered through UV and RO. More pressure than I had in town!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Still snowing here, but it looks like it will all melt by this afternoon. My poor flowers are confused all the daffodils popped out last week when it was warm and now they are all droopy :(

@Ireland

THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!! I love soda bread! My neighbor has a bunch of currents and I am eager to try this recipe. THANK YOU AGAIN! I usually only get it now is when my Grandmother makes it. She is 87 now and does not do that very often. Kiss your bride PAL and tell her thanks from me. Ye're a lucky bye! (Way Grandma says boy sounds like bye) Asks me... "Byes duun well?" All the time...lol...



http://www.myspace.com/kittyprincess
"Whatever the next best thing is, it better not suck."
Ripper ROCKED this sig for me!
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21. March 2007 @ 13:35 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
Pacman:

Quote:
Found out the compressor in a 2 year old Trane
My uncle retired from trane- clarksville tennessee-about 8 yrs ago. He had the #1 clock number there-very high on the seniority list!!!!

Nothing stops a TRANE!!!!

I just signed a contract for a new house,actually a 6 yr old doublewide that's on a very solid block foundation and nearly 2,300 sq ft!!!!!Plenty of room for all the little-uns. Hopefully we'll close by the 15th of April. It's a repo and may not have been winterized,but I got a hell of a deal on it along with the lot.

34 degrees this morning and over 70 now!! Got some high wind and rain headed our way so another crappy weekend coming up!!!!

My dad got back from tennessee sunday and said my cousin has already mowed twice this year down there, LOL




HP a1118x-b/athlon 64-3300+/BenQ 1650 BCDC/LG 8163B/Modded Wii/Epson-R300 and Ty Watershields!!!
PacMan777
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21. March 2007 @ 15:51 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
LOL I can't say nothing stops a Trane anymore. Obviously something did. ;) I guess the problem was your uncle wasn't there to build mine. They're still top of the line, and I'd buy another. If it goes down again before the warranty expires (or shortly after), I'll have to rethink that.

I've already had a round of dandelions. The frost got the little buggers though. My Easter Lilies are doing well. Time to start doing the preseason lawn care thing. It won't be long till mowing starts, the grass is on the rise. LOL

Just north of you my sister-in-law and her husband are gearing up. They've got 5 acres they mow weekly. He keeps dreaming of a large drag mower and she keeps reminding him of how dangerous he is with large power equipment. LOL


PacMan777
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21. March 2007 @ 15:58 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
Saugmon
I forgot, that sounded like the makings of a country song. "My uncle, he done gone and got off the Trane at the Clarksville station." ;)

Sounds like you got a good deal on the doublewide. I kept expecting you to say it had a Trane. ;) A friend of mine has a doublewide and you can't tell it's prefab. It's on a block foundation and he dressed that up with hand laid sandstone. Then he built an adjoining garage and matched the siding. He's built a permanent porch on the front and he's now in the process of putting a porch/patio on the rear. It looks better and has more room than a lot of standard construction homes.


This message has been edited since posting. Last time this message was edited on 21. March 2007 @ 16:07

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21. March 2007 @ 19:26 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
Just got back from trying to clean up a friend's parents' computer. 75 trojan downloaders and that was just the beginning.....................................................



My killer sig came courtesy of bb "El Jefe" mayo.
The Forum Rules You Agreed To! http://forums.afterdawn.com/thread_view.cfm/2487
"And there we saw the giants, and we were in our own sight as grasshoppers, and so we were in their sight" - Numbers 13:33

This message has been edited since posting. Last time this message was edited on 21. March 2007 @ 19:26

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22. March 2007 @ 00:47 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
Quote:
75 trojan
Sounds like the sequel to 300 spartans, LOL




HP a1118x-b/athlon 64-3300+/BenQ 1650 BCDC/LG 8163B/Modded Wii/Epson-R300 and Ty Watershields!!!
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22. March 2007 @ 01:17 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
@Nephilim.

I thought my sons was bad...47 Trojans and 350 Spyware...the guys in the AntiVirus section couldnt help...I had to reformat and re install.Funny thing it runs a lot faster now, he didnt run any sort of scan for almost 2 years. I now have control..run BOTH weekly.



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PacMan777
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22. March 2007 @ 02:21 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
Besides the spyware, viruses, worms and the like, adware is a growing problem. Seems some sites are being overly friendly and adding BHOs along with the cookies. Those favor certain sites when you do a search and in some cases will highjack the browser. Windows allows the BHOs, but my other AV ware asks before one can be loaded. Most only deal with ads and aren't a threat, but they slow down the browser. Like Gwen I do the housekeeping weekly. I run the AV, it's on auto. Then I do a couple of extra programs to see if anything additional shows up. Most of the time I find a few extra items the AV alone doesn't catch. It's nothing to hurt the system, just annoying adware. Ad-Aware SE Pro is part of the weekly cleanup.


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22. March 2007 @ 04:07 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
Hey all, good morning. Just wanted all my friends on AD to know I am still around, although I have not been posting. Had some health probs lately. I had a triple bypass 7 years ago, and I guess the warranty kind of ran out, cause my last tests did not come back to good. Am having a heart cath next week and hopefully the news will be better. Wanted you people to know I have not deserted and will be back posting up a storm real soon. Cheers and thanks to all for the good times I have enjoyed from all of you.................Pete


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22. March 2007 @ 04:15 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
arniebear
welcome back,and i and my bride will pray that all will come out great for ye...and hurry back as we all missed ye..
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22. March 2007 @ 04:20 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
Thank you Ireland my friend all prayers greatfully accepted :)


gerry1
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22. March 2007 @ 04:26 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
@Arnie....nice to hear from you; I was wondering where you've been. Missed you quick wit! Sorry to hear of your medical problems ... know that you're in my prayers as well.
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22. March 2007 @ 04:28 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
Thanks gerry, hope my med problems get solved as fast as an AnyDVD update, lol :)


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22. March 2007 @ 04:56 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
Sorry to hear about your problems Pete, hope you are on the road to recovery very soon my friend.


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22. March 2007 @ 05:11 _ Link to this message    Send private message to this user   
@arniebear,
I know that you don't know me but I feel I know you with all the help you've provided with your tut's and direct intervention. LOL.

Get well soon. :)

btw my Dad had triple by-pass and then triple aneurism surgery about 2 years ago and he's doin fine.:) HTH....

....gm

[img]quoted from creaky, "I think i need a break away from this thread, you are just talking absolute and utter nonsense now. Im off to ban myself and hit myself repeatedly with blunt objects. And if im still conscious after that im going to install Windows Me."[/img]
PC build thread blank media thread Ultimate DVD Backup resource thread what did binkie7 do to me???
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